February 2011
45 posts
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RETURN TO SENDER
apio:
Reen: my male friendships haven’t historically fared well because they all turn into Nice Guys™ but Reen: I want to lure him into a friendship while keeping my vagina out of the equation. Janet: girl your vagina has to be in like, another country. Janet: SORRY, CHANGE OF ADDRESS, OUT OF COUNTRY ON BUSINESS.
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”Ես մի չոր ծառ էի, Դու գարնան արեւ, Քո սիրով ծաղկեցավ իմ ժյուղն ու տերեւ, Վայ, վայ, վայ, վառվում եմ, …Վայ, վայ, վայ, հալվում եմ, Հալվում, վարվում եմ:” – Կոմիտաս
I was a dry, wilting tree.
You were the Spring sun.
Your love shone upon me
And my branches grew,
And my leaves bloomed.
Vay, vay, vay, but now I’m burning.
Vay, vay, vay, but now I’m melting.
Now I’m melting and...
apio asked: http://i19.photobucket.com/albums/b193/shopgirl7298/henry-cavill-state-supreme-courthouse-13.jpg HOWW???????????????????????????????
January 2011
120 posts
4 tags
“I THINK GOD JUST THREW WOMEN A BONE. LIKE, I THINK IF THE 70 CENT TO A DOLLAR...”
– Janet’s texts re: the casting of Henry Cavill as Superman. (via apio)
#janet: combining economics and vulgar jokes since 1989
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The dailywhat was like "relatively-unknown actor"...
-Reen
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I feel like something MOMENTOUS just occurred....
-Reen
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HENRY CAVILL IS SUPERMAN.
MY FELLOW SISTERS, WE HAVE THINGS TO DO
BUY A GOAT
FIND AN ALTER
SACRIFICE THE GOAT TO THE GODS
CONTINUE TO INHALE AND EXHALE UNTIL THIS MOVIE COMES OUT.
INHALE AND EXHALE VERY HEAVILY DURING AND SOMETIME AFTER THIS MOVIE COMES OUT
FIND THE CURE TO CANCER ALREADY. COME ON, IT SHOULDN’T BE THAT HARD - OBVIOUSLY THERE EXISTS A SUPREME MORAL FORCE IN THIS UNIVERSE.
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NYC truth: You know you're about to enter Queens...
apio:
I’m just saying, you guys. I love that point on the E or the 7 when I’m heading home and it’s like someone just put the train through a centrifuge cause all the white blood cells are like “PEACE.”
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I think Guy Pierce is really hot.
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"Marcel's lucky I took anger management because...
—Dale.
I’m digging Dale lately.
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THE LAST TWO EPS OF THE SECOND SEASON OF BREAKING...
ALL THE GUILT. ALL THE GUILT IN THE WORLD.
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Reblog with your Blog Title and the reason for it. →
(via monkeyknifefight)
I’ll Have the Cake, Please
A line from Eddie Izzard’s famous “Cake or Death?” stand-up comedy bit. I’ve made no secret of my love for this man or his take on religion, film, culture, anything. And frankly, to the question “Cake or Death” or just “You want some cake?” my answer would always be the one that gets me some...
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kafrininterman replied to your post: 4-year-old girl looking for a real man, no smokers.
I think this is a perfect post. IS THAT A UNIBROW OR A SHADOW THO? DID YOU LOVE A MAN WITH A UNIBROW?
That is a unibrow. Only real men have unibrows. And only real women love men with unibrows.
These statements may or may not be influenced by the fact that I have a unibrow.
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4-year-old girl looking for a real man, no...
So wait. Hold up. Let me talk before you ask questions. Remember this kid? He is the precocious super cool 14-year-old kid who made an awesome speech against anti-gay bullying and inspired everyone (and is also openly gay). Well, of course, some of the older generation out there -out of all of the shit they could have talked about - wondered how a 14-year-old boy already knew he was gay.
...
umnica asked: I feel like you should have a twitter. What are your feelings on this?
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I’m not doing the Tumblr challenge thing, but my middle name is Jakop. Like ‘Jacob’ but a weird Armenian spelling that my dad chose when he had to came here. My brother and I both have “Jakop” as a our middle name because yaaay patriarchy your father owns you.
So bitches don’t complain.
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Mom: What are knee-kers? Knickers?
Me: It means underwear.
Mom: Is that how the British call it? That’s stupid.
*Silent pride at the subtle hilarity/oh shit assimilation is for real/awesomeness of my immigrant Mother being all ‘Americans are better bitches’*
Also, somewhat unrelated, the super of our building is an Irish-immigrant and every time my Mom will chat with her like “yeah, yes, absolutely,...
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The Difference between Brits and Americans
One of the main differences between American and British culture, I think, is the prominence of class stratification in the latter. Brits can tell a lot by just your accent - just by the way you speak. Americans can do it to some extent too. For example, this is what the typical American can determine about another American by his speech:
Oh he’s Puerto Rican - a New Yorker, Bronx or East...
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HUNTER PARRISH IS EXACTLY WHAT I MEANT WHEN I SAID
apio:
PRETTY FACES/BAD PERFORMANCES.
Yes. To this.
and #i only saw him in that one really white-people movie #~It’s Complicated~
YES. TO. THIS.
The most WHITE-PEOPLE MOVIE EVERRRRRR. I mean I’m not hating; it was cute with Meryl Streep, Alec Baldwin and John Krasinski was the CUTEST. But Meryl Streep’s kids were just the WHITEST things IN EXISTENCE. Like “no...
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Sam Cooke and the Soul Stirrers - Come,...
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UNPOPULAR OPINION TIMEEEE
rockyoulikeacop:
I don’t like cats. I don’t. They’re just…..drippy. And they gross me out. Now I’ll wait for the legion of future cat-ladies there are on Tumblr to attack me. DO YOUR WORST.
I abhor cats. They’re selfish, smelly, useless pieces of shit.
#Cats can all die and I wouldn’t care #Their should be a cat civil war #so they can all die
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Mistakes have been made.
Are you serious?
ARE YOU SERIOUS?
For Boardwalk to win Best Drama Series when the nominee list also includes Dexter and The Walking Dead is preposterous enough, but Steve Buscemi for best performance? His acting was the worst on the ENTIRE SHOW and his performance was certainly inferior to that of Michael C. Hall and Bryan Cranston.
Hollywood Foreign Press:
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Prettiest song ever.
A Daisy in December by Mich...
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“WE TRICK THEM INTO THINKING WE’RE SERIOUS WRITERS AND THEN WE WHIP OUT THE...”
– Reen, on her true intentions as a future filmmaker. Dash cunning of you.
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Dude, I'm killing at Jeopardy.
That Post I made about Fall of Giants: Part 3
So, the question tonight was about some statues of guys on horses (Really Jeopardy?) - and the question was something along the lines of “Honored in Kiev, this man, named “blah blah” led the army of these mountain peoples of Ukraine and Poland.” And I was like “THE COSSACKS????”
And IT WAS RIGHT.
The funny thing...
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“The crowd continued to grow. Perhaps Russians could smell booze at a distance.”
– Fall of Giants by Ken Follett
Most accurate, Follett. Most accurate.
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Dad: Jan, make me some cognac.
Me: Sure. Do you want it with ice?
Dad: NO, you don’t put ice in cognac, only whiskey. Haven’t I taught you anything?
…..ice in my cognac….you gotta be fucking kidding me
#WHAT DO I HAVE TO DO TO MAKE YOU PROUD DADDY? #TELL ME #BE A BARTENDER?
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"What is Janet’s life? I’m not really sure—it’s...
—Reen
This is a sum-up of my life by someone who really knows me.
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Johnny came lately. Better than prematurely, if...
Yo, remember my post about Ken Follett teaching me history? Well, I WASN’T KIDDING. I’m watching Jeopardy yesterday, and the topic is ‘3-word answers’, and the question is something like “Who was Prime Minister of England during Word War I?” At first I was like”ASQUITH!” and then I realized it had to be 3-words, so I yelled “LLOYD GEORGE. DAVID...
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I saw this photographer's blog today that was all →
apio:
“candid” photos of girls in their ~natural habitats chillin out ~naturally and shit. At least, they were meant to be natural, and then I saw they were all like “Whoops, you caught me in my underwear staring into my fridge,” and “Oh I’m just relaxing here, reading Kafka in my ipex bra,” and “AHAHA…screen is so funny also I forgot to button my shirt”.
And I’m like, “…Oh.” :|
And...
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I saw this photographer's blog today that was all →
apio:
“candid” photos of girls in their ~natural habitats chillin out ~naturally and shit. At least, they were meant to be natural, and then I saw they were all like “Whoops, you caught me in my underwear staring into my fridge,” and “Oh I’m just relaxing here, reading Kafka in my ipex bra,” and “AHAHA…screen is so funny also I forgot to button my shirt”.
And I’m like, “…Oh.” :|
And...
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“If I’m being honest, I think at my age, I can totally run a country.”
– Reen, at age 16.
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Mom: Can you look up a recipe for cinnamon raisin...
“And God said, ‘Cinnamon raisin bagels shall bring peace unto this world.” FoodChapterofBible 8:11.
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Christian Bale's Motherfucking Face
babsy:
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"And I loved you in The Fighter."
—Robert De Niro to Matt Damon, Golden Globes 2011
If Matt Damon and Mark Walhberg ever played two gay guys in a movie….
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